The Dreadful Puns Thread (An Occasional Series)

[BigSkyBrad]

[Captain Colonial]

[Greenstreak-Andy D]

Kids got me ‘Dad’s jokes’ cards which somehow has reached the man shed! 😂!

[stephenh]

A Sign in a shoe repair store: 

We will heel you  
We will save your sole  
We will even dye for you. 
 

In a Podiatrist's office:    
"Time wounds all heels.”  
 

On a Septic Tank Truck: 
Yesterday's Meals on Wheels 
 

At an Optometrist's Office:  
"If you don't see what you're looking for,  
You've come to the right place.”  
 

On a Plumber's truck :  
"We repair what your husband fixed.” 
 

On another Plumber's truck: 
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.” 
 

At a Tyre Shop in Milwaukee:  
"Invite us to your next blowout.” 
 

On an Electrician's truck:  
"Let us remove your shorts.”; 
 

In a Non-smoking Area:  
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action.”  
 

On a Maternity Room door:  
"Push. Push. Push.” 
 

The English language is weird at times! Appropriate signs advertising services?

 

At a Car Dealership: 
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.” 
 

Outside a Muffler Shop:  
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.” 
 

In a Veterinarian's waiting room: 
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!” 
 

At the Electric Company:  
"We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time. 
However, if you don't, YOU will be de-lighted.” 
 

In a Restaurant window:  
"Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.”  
 

In the front yard of a Funeral Home: 
"Drive carefully. We'll wait.” 
 

At a Propane Filling Station: 
"Thank Heaven for little grills.” 
 

In a Chicago Radiator Shop:  
"Best place in town to take a leak.” 
 

And the best one for last:

Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck: 
"Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises"

[Captain Colonial]

[Steve (sdh2903)]

[Captain Colonial]

[Captain Colonial]

[Captain Colonial]

[mikef]

[Captain Colonial]

[mikef]

[Blatman]

In the UK that date is a palindrome too...

22/2/22

I'm 2 good  

[Captain Colonial]

[Captain Colonial]