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Dave the Scouser is touring the USA. Along the way, he stops off at a remote bar in the Nevada desert and chats to the bartender when he spots a Red Indian in full tribal dress seated in the corner of the bar. "Blimey!" remarks Dave. "Who's he?" "Gee, that's the memory man," replies the bartender. "He knows everything there is to know. Got a memory like an elephant, he can remember any fact. Heck, go and try him out!" Dave heads over to the Red Indian, thinking that he can outsmart him with a question about English football. He asks the memory man, "Who won the 1965 FA cup final?" "Liverpool," came the instantaneous reply. Dave was stunned. He tried again asking, "Who did they beat?" "Leeds," replied the memory man. Dave tried once more asking, "What was the final score?" The wise Red Indian didn't hesitate in answering, "2-1." Dave thinks he'll get smart, asking the memory man for the name of the winning goal scorer. Without so much as blinking, the Red Indian says, "Ian St John." Dave is stunned and returns home to Liverpool, where he tells everyone about the Red Indian. Dave's curiosity lingers, and he vows to return to America and pay his respects to the Indian. Ten years later, Dave finally saved up enough money to return and, after weeks of searching the Nevada desert, once more he finds the Red Indian, now in a cave. Humbled by the Red Indian, Dave steps forward, bows and, as a mark of admiration, greets the brave in his traditional tongue. "How," Dave says. The memory man pops on a pair of very thick - lens glasses, squints at him and replies, "A diving header in the six-yard box."

A man was stuck in a traffic jam on the road outside Parliament when suddenly a man knocks on his car window. The driver puts his window down slightly and asks, "What’s the matter?" The man replies, “Terrorists have kidnapped all the MPs inside the House of Commons! They’re asking for £1,000,000,000 or they will douse them with petrol and set them on fire. We’re collecting donations from car to car." The driver asks, “How much on average is everyone giving?" "About two litres.”

Great minds and all that...

Calling @Mark Redpath - WSCC Membership Secretary to the thread please

🤡

Anyway, in conclusion, buy Jenveys.

I know what you meant Dave I was deliberately misunderstanding for comic effect* *comic effect not guaranteed.

Infinitely adjustable settings* *within a certain range I'll have to remember that one for my next sales pitch! :D

Go on @Ben (bunje) - you know you want to 😁

This is a fantastic little car. I have been in it many times and it performs brilliantly and is very capable on the track.

oops, typing at the same time!

calling @Mark Redpath - WSCC Membership Secretary

I've had an engine package like this off Mark before and it was absolutely spot on. He does the hard work so you don't have to 😄

Still on mine! Well sort of - as the arches are off the car 🤣

We’ll warm the tarmac up for you on the 12th

Please bare with us for a small while longer @Steve Smith - AO Hampshire And Isle Of Wight the Organisers of the event have only recently confirmed our location, which is normally done before Xmas, so we're in frantic catch up mode as lots of activities are based on the location of the plot (ground penetration testing, Marque size etc). We're not far off being in a position to communicate with the members and reach out to our great Volunteers who help us to make ours the best stand of the show. If the whole show is smaller, that means we should have more people per square metre visiting our stand 😉

O dear... not even me with my old machine would do that... The wheel has slipped in to the jaws, Probably he has used the wrong clamping method, specially if they were track tyres with stiff sidewall. An small wheel needs to be clamped from the outside with plastic protectors. Really poor work, and astonished that someone that does that for a living, dont know how to do it properly. This offer wont sort your problem, but to whoever is worried about their wheels, feel free to pop over to mines one afternoon, and with a set of beers and for the cost of the weights and new valves we'll do it with the ammount of care requiered. This is open to everyone in the club that has Crewe on hand...

How come she can take me out in this!!! but then it’s too cold to go out in the Westie! Go figure 🥶. Funny things wife’s 🤐

I have a mk1 Escort rack if you want to come and collect it

A forecast of showers this weekend may just ground us I am afraid.