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Man goes into the chemists and says "Can I have a hot water bottle, please" Chemist says "Sorry, we don't have any. Have you tried Boots" Man says "Yes, but the water comes out of the laceholes"

Hope you northern English folk like Irn Bru... If you don't know what it is, it's a soft drink that looks exactly like the water from a xflow radiator..!

Feel free to add your own below... Man goes into a chemist and says: "I want to buy some deodorant." "Ball or aerosol?" "Neither. I want it for my armpits."

Both ZK (classic) and FW Carbon Effect Stone Guards are now on special offer! £80.00 inc VAT per pair Limited stock available. Order via telephone only. Tel: 01384 400077

Eh I've worked on there!!!! Errr, but not in that capacity.

I was looking on ebay for traffic lights and there are a few for sale, do you have a sideline shaggy?

Track Day instruction is being headed up by AdamR and we will be having an additional 2 or 3 instructors who have voluntered. These slot are on a first come first served basis and can only be booked on the day. These slots are Free of Charge Sprint School is also free of charge but i will be having a collecting bucket for no obligation donations to charity.

There is no way Yorkshire will join up with anywhere in Lancashire let alone Scotland

Just ended contract with the Forestry Commision as a deer contractor ( hired killer )...! now setting up a business selling Venison Burgers yum yum...! William

Ah, thanks. Small world though! I think everyone hankered after one of those, haha. The M5 is indeed pretty impressive, they have started doing alloy versions of the same design too.

Looks a decent helmet... For anybody considering a helmet are you aware that there is a gov web site that details helmet crash tests as part of SHARP (Helmet safety scheme), it gives ratings for helmets and also how each helmet fairs on crash protection for front, side and rear protection. http://sharp.direct.gov.uk/testsratings/hjc-cs-14 As ever it's a balance between technology, which means cost, protection, features,,,, but as stated earlier the fit is all important...The web site also details how to check the fit....

+1 for the "you did the decent thing" camp. I would have done the same, but thats why I never have any money... I was a bit suprised to hear he kicked off over the tax and was about to comment negatively. But then I just thought if he is "buying a banger" perhaps the tax money is a lot to him. Don't get me wrong, it is in no way your problem and he should take it on the chin, but might explain why he's grumbling. And I hope you got yourself a shed load of good karma and you remember us all when the massive Euro millions roll over comes your way..!

Great. Can we get the WSCC banners on French TV?

The tax problem isn't your fault, let him sort it. You've been extremely generous to this point.....

Yoda impressions, Oh Gods, it's worse than we thought, has someone been feeding him special jelly too? Don't worry, if you come home from your hols with a funny haircut and a fondness for platform shoes, we'll order some more dried frog pills for you!