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What really gets ur goat


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Posted
buying one or two things in the supermarket and being asked if I'd like someone to help me with the packing???
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Posted

Hearing someone else clip their fingernails.

Hearing a dog lick itself.

People that snore.

Posted

Ageing

My inability to stop at 1 or 2 glasses of alcohol

Drunken tramps on train stations who try to arrest you by showing you a discarded bus pass

Nutters on empty train stations who, whilst reading your newspaper over your shoulder, state that they too were a spy

Nutters in post office queues - there's always one (other than me)

Not being rich despite being a fairly hard worker whilst a few ne'er do wells feather their nests by abusing state benefits

My ability to spot hidden agenda's at a 1000 yards

Conference calls with "English" "speaking" foreign co-workers

The drunken Irish tv-through-window-throwing b*****ds who made my life hell when they were neighbours of mine back in Finsbury Park

When single, spending an entire train journey sitting opposite a hot chick who is giving you "What a weirdo!?!" looks despite your best smile only to realise, when having got out into the cold winter air of your destination station's platform, that your johnson isn't exactly as hidden as it should normally be.

Not being able to drive my Westie

Posted

People who turn on Fog lights when it's not foggy / or when it's raining, then leave them on.

My neighbour who has never completed a single task he started.

My neighbour who decided to buy a 7.5 tonne kna****ed horse box to start a business, and then parked it up along side his house, for all to see, where it has stayed for the last 2 years.

My neighbour who decided to get rid of his old leather sofa, and managed to have enough energy to get it out of the house, but then propped it up against the above horsebox, where it has stayed for the last 3 months.

(I used to live in a half decent neighbourhood, now it resembles Steptoe & Sons Yard).

Yaris "drivers"

Posted
Snowboarders - learn to ski you feckless baggy-trousered wastrels

there nothing wrong with snowboarding with baggy trousers. :D  :D

Posted

After last night

Old ******s in expensive sportscars.

Grrrrrr  in SWMBO's KA  I overtook a merc slk . it pulled beside at a red light , on green , he floors it , only to reach max velocity of 55mph , so I had to negotiate another pass.

5mls further another red light , he catches up and pulls the same stunt , so I overtake him again .

He couldn't keep up after that ...t****r

Posted

People who use metric and imperial measurements in the same sentence.  :p  :p  :D

That'll be most of us in the building trade then  :D

Only playing I ordered a carpet today 14 feet x 4 metres

:D  :p

Edit.. its ok Oliver (the Dutton driver) it wasn't yours lol

Posted

Certain people in my office who talk for ages on their mobiles which make all the landline phones in the vicinity buzz annoyingly the whole time.  :angry:

The same certain people in my office who play back their umpteen voicemail messages on speakerphone on maximum volume for all to hear.  :angry:  :angry:

The same certain people who ring other phones whilst on speakerphone and leave the phone beeping on maximum volume, unanswered, for bl**dy ages  :angry:  :angry:  :angry:

Posted
One HGV trying to overtake another on a dual carriageway, the elephant race normally takes five minutes to be completed causing tailbacks and,as I saw last weekend on the A14, a rear end shunt accident. :bangshead:  :bangshead:
Posted
After last night

Old ******s in expensive sportscars.

Grrrrrr  in SWMBO's KA  I overtook a merc slk . it pulled beside at a red light , on green , he floors it , only to reach max velocity of 55mph , so I had to negotiate another pass.

5mls further another red light , he catches up and pulls the same stunt , so I overtake him again .

He couldn't keep up after that ...t****r

Maybe he didn't want to speed?  :devil:  :p  ;)

Posted
One HGV trying to overtake another on a dual carriageway, the elephant race normally takes five minutes to be completed causing tailbacks and,as I saw last weekend on the A14, a rear end shunt accident. :bangshead:  :bangshead:

yep that would be top of the list for me too  :bangshead:  :bangshead:  :bangshead:  :bangshead:  :arse:  :arse:

*sits back and awaits flack from the resident yorkie munchers  :oops:

Posted

D**kheads who cant figure out/be arsed to check their lights and drive with one stuck on main beam...... the same kn*bwipes who then blow their obvously b******d main beam bulb who then put on their fog lights.

anyone who uses their fog lights in anything other than thick fog..... just because on the damp fields there is some low level mist hampering you seeing the fence a mile away doesnt mean you need to usethem

chavs who think fog lights makes their corsa faster...

solution to this problem, allow the police to pull them and smash said fog lights with a hammer  :angry:

Posted
solution to this problem, allow the police to pull them and smash said fog lights with a hammer  :angry:

Why just the fog lights? Why not the Chavs as well?

Posted
People who sit at lights with their foot on the brake pedal 'cos they're too lazy to use the handbrake, totally oblivious to the fact that their high intensity brake lights are causing arc-eye for the poor sod behind them :mad:
Posted

People who think the cinema is an ideal place for a chat.

That slouched over thing people do when they're pushing  a supermarket trolley.

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