may i ask a sad question

[Richard (OldStager)]

2 hours ago, Mole said:

This is still pretty raw for me, we had to make the decision 12 weeks ago .. the first time. Our 10 year old Jack Russell was not well.. what made things worse is that she was eating and drinking, peeing and pooing... as dogs owners know they are the key things... but I was at home recovering from Covid and my partner Carol was in hospital with covid and I noticed that Poppy had an insatiable appetite. For a start i thought it was just because I was looking after her and was under feeding her..  Then luckily Carol recovered and she agreed that her eating was not normal but excessive. I took her to the vets and there was a locum vet on.. his first comments were his concern for sedating her because of her heart condition... that was the first time we had heard about this, despite using the same vet for the ten years.. I was shocked and upset.. So we took her to a different practice and they confirmed Poppy's heart condition and said they needed to do a scan. Poppy hated the vets and her terrier instinct took over and she would try and attack them, therefore she had to be sedated for the heart scan.. which of course was a concern because of her heart, but it was a risk we had to take..

The scan showed that she had a heart condition and it would need treatment... 

I won't go on.. but we had some really difficult things and more vets visits but still her insatiable hunger continued, plus she started showing signs of dementia.. things like standing behind a door when trying to open it... standing and shaking.. but the hardest thing was she was not playing with her toys or wagging her tail.. she was just not happy... plus she kept looking at us asking for food..

I got the vet to come to the house and see her... and we talked things through and the diagnosis was that she most likely had a brain tumour that was getting worse, despite her young age.. The vet explained that she would have to go to a veterinary hospital for further scans and then if it was a tumour she would need an operation on her brain etc etc etc.. plus she had a weak heart..

I already knew before the vet came the action we had to take, but I needed Carol to come to the same conclusion for herself... as the vet left Carol said what I knew needed to happen.. So i arranged for the vet to come to our house the next day and put her to sleep in her garden...her favourite place. I think the decision I had to make was the hardest ever especially as she was so young plus I knew how much losing Poppy would affect Carol.. she is still her mess as she was Carol's little girl.. plus the house is empty without her..

We had her cremated which I think was the right thing and we still have her ashes..

 

In answer to your question and as others have said... think about the great life your dog has had and all the happy times.. but don't be selfish and keep them alive for your benefit, think of them and if they are suffering do the right thing, you will know when that time is.

so , so sorry for the both of you and the poor dog. that rescue i had was 3 when he had to be put down and i felt gutted he had not had a proper life having spent his first 2 years getting beaten, we did however have a great 12 months together and he came out of his shell and played as a normal dog would, so at least he did not suffer all his time on earth without knowing how to be a dog for the last years worth.

 

I am not sure if i could have a pets ashes at home, although i respect folks that do, i think it would upset me too much everytime i saw the casket. and the reason why when last years dog went, as soon as i had returned from the vets , i binned all her bedding,and toys that the other dog never played with, it took me a good few months before i could even look at a photo of her as i would just burst into tears.

 

as i said above, not entirely sure i would get another one for the reason glen has said

 

wishing you all the best anyway.

 

[Richard (OldStager)]

i did not expect less than a week after i started this thread , to say i now know when the last day is.

 

normally every morning he has a wagging tail and full of beans for the day ahead, this morning he looked quite peeved, no wagging tail  and took far longer than normal to get to his feet, he was let out for his morning ablutions and then  i feed him at that point, he eat just as normal but kept raising one foot at a time, presumably to take the weight off it  - lessening the pain. climbing the stairs took twice as long as last week as well.

 

before covid, my vets had a drop in facility, sadly this is no longer operational and having just rung them they are full for today and have very limited staff on a sunday which is for emergencies only.

 

so unless there is a marked improvement, monday is the day sadly.

as i have said already, i dont want to go down the pain relief route as that is just prolonging the inevitable,  he is almost completely deaf, his eyesight is failing as he often can not see the treat in front of him, despite his nose telling him its there.

 

sorry for posting my ramblings, but living alone i just wanted to document my thoughts. it sort of helps me...

 

thanks all.

[Dave Eastwood (Gadgetman) - Club Chairman]

No apology required. So sad to read this. Being right doesn't make it easier. But my heart really goes out to you.

[Glen_I]

So sorry to hear this.......

[Glen_I]

2 hours ago, OldStager said:

sorry for posting my ramblings, but living alone i just wanted to document my thoughts. it sort of helps me...

As Dave said, no need to apologise....I'm almost the opposite and keep all my worries and concerns pent up and very rarely speak about it, not even to my wife. Why?? Not sure, maybe because my family (as in parents) are not ones to openly speak out about issues, so you deal with it and get on. Has this rubbed off on me? I guess so!!

 

So if speaking about it helps then do so!

 

Clearly there are a lot of animal loving folk on this forum and as been discussed already we feel the pain and emotions that are running through you right now.

[Richard (OldStager)]

thanks all,

well this afternoon i to decided to go and do some gardening, he joined me out there and for the most part was just being a dog, he wanted to play and would drop his toys at my feet to throw one, which i did, but he gave up chasing after them halfway through leaving muggins here to retrieve them all from various flower beds etc.. as the day has gone on he has improved which makes the decision even harder, however i fully expect to see him as he was this morning, tomorrow first thing.

i know that feeling, as i am not at my best for a few hours after waking, posting this stuff for me helps me deal with what is looming and thank you for the kind words - yet again.

i am trying to be positive about all this and if i was to take just one thing away from my mental health counseling many years ago, its that despite disasters in life there are always better times ahead if you are prepared to think that way.

see how this goes as we move into a new week.

once again thank you, and for reading my drivel as this a car forum and not a poorly pets one.....

[Richard (OldStager)]

4 hours ago, Glen_I said:

I'm almost the opposite and keep all my worries and concerns pent up and very rarely speak about it, not even to my wife. Why?? Not sure, maybe because my family (as in parents) are not ones to openly speak out about

 I dont think you are alone, as i did that and i think we are the generation that was taught not to show your feelings, we were taught by our parents who themselves were taught by their parents, back then we were at war and it was the old stiff upper lip that the british had then thats said you should not show any emotions outside of your house.

 

today thankfully we can and hopefully not be seen as weak somehow. i spent 40 odd years keeping my mouth shut and it did me no good at all.

[Paul Aspden (MoFast)]

This is always a terribly heart breaking part of pet ownership.

 

The thing to remember is that when animals become pets our human nature tends to over rule our humane nature.

 

If you’re asking the question then you probably already know what the right answer is for your pet.

 

 

[Richard (OldStager)]

6 minutes ago, Paul Aspden The 2nd said:

This is always a terribly heart breaking part of pet ownership.

 

The thing to remember is that when animals become pets our human nature tends to over rule our humane nature.

 

If you’re asking the question then you probably already know what the right answer is for your pet.

 

 

i do know the answer, its when it gets acted upon. i will call the vets back on monday and see if they agree with me. as i eluded to above, the worst bit is after he has been laid down for say longer than 10 minutes he cant get up again , once on his feet it takes him an hour or so before he can walk or run properly, although both are for limited periods. i know what to do, i just want a second opinion from an expert , will update when i know more. why do we love our pets so much....

[Mole]

I am so sorry for you old stager..at this difficult time..but you have done the best for him so far and I know you will continue to do so..

My thoughts are with you..