Banned From Sainsbury's

[Fat Albert]

Didn't like shopping there anyway!

Today I was at my local Sainsbury's store buying a large bag of Winalot dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant? So on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Winalot Diet again.

I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in hospital last time, but I'd lost two stone before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in queue was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me I told her no, I stepped off the kerb to sniff an Irish Setter's A*** and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

I'm now banned from Sainsbury's.

[SteveD]

im banned from most food stores inc iceland and bhs

[Bananaman]

Quality    

Once got banned from Morrisons!  

[Matt Seabrook]

Thanks for that me me chuckle

[adamnreeves]

Funnies story I've heard for ages. Tears rolling down my face with laughter.

[jerryhzx12]

I was in the garden section of B&Q recently looking at some wood. One of the assiatants asked me if I wanted decking. Luckily I got the first one in and put him on his A***. I've been banned from there now....

[mud]

once got banned from Mc Donalds for holding a contest on who could get there gherkin to stick to the window the longest after being thrown at it from 5yrds or so.Also got banned from pizza hut because i walked out with the plate and bowl(still got the bowl) takeaway is takeaway right ?

both happened in Altrincham and both under the influence and no animals were harmed only the pizza hut manager who wore the meat feast after much discussion

[adamnreeves]

You guys are the perfect ingredients for a Christmas Party.

[Tigger]

im banned from most food stores inc iceland and bhs

.. and certain forums on occasion      

[dombanks]

lol... i ought to be banned. sainsburys was reducing stuff on comand today. you just had to go up to them and say ... " arnt you going to reduce this?" and they did it there and then

[matt_c]

im banned from most food stores inc iceland and bhs

And bathstore ?

[Bob Green]

Didn't like shopping there anyway!

Today I was at my local Sainsbury's store buying a large bag of Winalot dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant? So on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Winalot Diet again.

I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in hospital last time, but I'd lost two stone before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in queue was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me I told her no, I stepped off the kerb to sniff an Irish Setter's A*** and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

I'm now banned from Sainsbury's.

I love sharp wit.  That is so good.

       

[Norman Verona]

I've never been banned from any shops = only car clubs  

[Martin Keene]

Crying...

[barney]

im banned from most food stores inc iceland and bhs

And bathstore ?

pmsl......  

the guy in the shower dept is still in therapy