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Women's Dictionary


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Posted

DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS

        40-ish                        -       49

        Adventurous               -       Slept with everyone

        Athletic                      -       No tits

        Average looking          -       Ugly

        Beautiful                 -       Pathological liar

        Contagious Smile        -       Does a lot of pills

        Emotionally secure      -       On medication

        Feminist                     -       Fat

        Free spirit                   -       Junkie

        Friendship first            -       Former very *friendly* person

        Fun                            -      Annoying

        New Age                    -       Body hair in the wrong places

        Open-minded              -       Desperate

        Outgoing                    -       Loud and Embarrassing

        Passionate                 -       Sloppy drunk

        Professional               -       b***h

        Voluptuous                 -     &nbs! p; Very Fat

        Large frame                 -       Hugely Fat

        Wants Soul mate         -       Stalker

WOMEN'S ENGLISH:

        1. Yes                                  =       No

        2. No                                    =       Yes

        3. Maybe                               =       No

        4. We need                            =       I want

        5. I am sorry                           =       you'll be sorry

        6. We need to talk                   =       you're in trouble!

        7. Sure, go ahead                    =       you better not

        8. Do what you want                 =       you will pay for this later

        9. I am not upset                      =      Of course I am upset, you moron!

      10. You're very attentive tonight    =      is sex all you ever think about?

MEN'S ENGLISH

 

     

        1. I am hungry                                     =       I am hungry

        2. I am sleepy                                      =       I am sleepy

        3. I am tired                                         =       I am tired

        4. Nice dress                                        =       Nice cleavage!

        5. I love you                                          =       let's have sex now

        6. I am bored                                         =       Do you want to have sex?

        7. May I have this dance?                       =       I'd like to have sex with you

        8. Can I call you sometime?                    =       I'd like to have sex with you

        9. Do you want to go to a movie?             =       I'd like to have sex with you

        10. Can I take you out to dinner?              =       I'd like to have sex with you

        11. Those shoes don't go with that outfit    =      I'm gay

 

And finally.....

A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle.

 

For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with rugged, masculine features.

 

However, when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump shoved up his backside.

 

 

Buzz

Posted
However, when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump shoved up his backside.

New keyboard please :laugh:  :laugh:  :laugh:  :laugh:  :laugh:

Posted
lol...u gotta remember though that women should be better than men cos, men have standards and women have double standards. :D
Posted
lol...u gotta remember though that women should be better than men cos, men have standards and women have double standards. :D

:D  :D  :D  :D

Buzz

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