Kylie Under the Knife aagin

[Buzz Billsberry]

Well it is indeed a sad day that Kylie has again to undergo serious surgery. After several years of pain with arthritis of the hip Kyle lost the fight to keep her right leg attached to her body. Whilst out on a blat last Sunday it parted company on the A169 while shall we say following a bike.

The difficultly for the surgeons with this delicate operation is the fact that the plastic cancer has spread to her other leg. Doctors have been scanning NHS & private hospitals ,Mattel, Palatoy,eBay, doll stores and children’s toy boxes the length and breath of the land but alas with no success, however, on Thursday of this week I managed to negotiate with my 8 year old god daughter Alex that I need the bottom end of her favourite doll, 'Noggin' to keep Kylie accustomed to the abuse that WSCC members have given her over the years. Plus Alex’s doll had the same colour cuffs as the collar of Kylie’s. After days of negotiation I told her that I was taking it anyway and that if she had any problem with that then ‘bring it on’. Cos’ I knew I could take her in a fight. I managed to suppress her sobbing feelings by adult bribery with a new DVD and PS2 game.

The good news is that the operation will take place over the weekend where her new slightly longer (same shoe size) more tanned, younger legs & hip will be re-attached in an 18 hour operation. If all goes well I expect Kylie to be home in time for a cycle ride we’ve got planned in the Peak District next Saturday.

As many of you know Kylie has been the centre of some viscous slander, personal abuse and even kidnapping & rape in the 7 years she’s been a member of the WSCC. The instigators of these personal attacks as many of you will know were Rob Navin, who is still under investigation for the Bromsgrove carrot incident and the two who were convicted Ron ‘Rocket’ Siddle and Steve Davis whom both are serving jail sentences, (see link Steve Davis Kylie confession for their heious crimes against my long term friend Kylie

I’m sure you’ll all wish her success & a speedy recovery in her up & coming operation. I will keep you informed of her progress over the coming weeks

Buzz

Lover & Friend

[Liam]

Best wishes for a speedy recovery

Ken and Barbie

[Rob Navin]

Our thourghs are with her Buzz.

We share your pain.

Maybee you could replace said limb with a carrott ?

[barney]

what and give him the chance to say he "eaten" a bit of Kylie        

[pistonbroke]

Praise be , thank you Alex for making the ultimate sacrifice , Now Kylie can be one again and we all can get a piece .

edit .......

Ooops!  I meant  "get some piece " of course  

 

[Boomy]

Change her name to Heather Mills.

Job done.

[perksy]

Change her name to Heather Mills.

Job done.

Trouble is if things didn't work out, She'd then want Buzz's Westy, His house and most of his pension...  

[Boomy]

Change her name to Heather Mills.

Job done.

Trouble is if things didn't work out, She'd then want Buzz's Westy, His house and most of his pension...  

Talking of which...

It's a very sad world we live in when Sir Paul McCartney and his wife

are facing divorce and all anyone seems to want to do is make jokes about

her false leg. Personally, I think it's prosthetic.

News reports have confirmed that Paul McCartney has separated from his

wife Heather Mills-McCartney. Mrs Mills-McCartney is said to be

distraught over the split. "He has been my crutch for so long"! She said in an

earlier Interview, "I have no idea why this has happened, I'm really stumped."

"She's running around in circles", according to a close friend, "she

will need all the support she can get. It's not like its easy to walk out

on a relationship like this."

After his break up with Heather, Paul was asked if he would ever

consider going down on one knee again. Paul said he would prefer it if we

called her Heather.

(i nearly snuffed it laughing when i read that one)

It is not known whether a pre-nuptial agreement was signed prior to

the marriage. Paul McCartney is one of the richest men in the world, and

if an agreement has been signed it is believed that she won't have a leg to stand on.

Rumours abound over the split which have suggested that infidelity may have been the

cause. "She's terrible" a source stated, "always trying to get her leg over."

Another source has suggested that her battle with alcoholism was the

cause. "Macca couldn't handle it anymore" a friend said, "he would

get home at night and find her legless."

Many have attributed this to a problem which started with the gift

that Paul bought her prior to the wedding He gave her a new prosthetic leg

for Christmas, but that was just a stocking-filler.

A miner in Africa has an accident and loses a leg.. He says to his

mate "I'm srewed, who will want a one-legged gold digger?" His mate says

"try Paul McCartney"

These jokes are funny but lets spare a thought for Paul please. Now

she has left him, he's going to struggle to find another woman who can

fill her shoe.

[felters]

I gather Macca had bought her a plane for Xmas... and a Ladyshave for her other leg  

[pistonbroke]

But what about the old girl with two wooden legs whose house caught fire ?

The fire brigade saved her house

but she got burnt to the ground  

[studbuckle]

Glad to hear things are on the up for Kylie.

Good luck for the OP, just remember that you can't take advantage while she's under.

[scott beeland]

just remember that you can't take advantage while she's under.

And why not?.I often take...............

     

[Blacknblue]

Talking of which...

a poem by Paul

They laid upon the grassy bank

His hands were all a quivver

He slowly undid her suspender belt

And her leg fell in the river