Last Week At Work

[Mark Stanton]

Fantastic Mr O            

I once walked out of a place after just 3 weeks - the boss threatened me with leagl action for breach of contract              I advised him what he could do with his so called contract that I had neither received nor signed - Next day started at new place       That's another bridge I never wish to cross again      

[Mrs Westy]

Was that the cat or you?

That was me, the cat regularly vomits (but thankfully doesn't do that) over stuff.  A while ago he puked in one of my shoes  

It was so traumatic I had to buy 5 more pairs to make up for it  

Back on topic: the good thing about being in Environmental Health is that you have to inspect your district for nuisances.  After I handed in my notice, knowing that I never wanted to be an EHO ever again, I spent the best part of 6 weeks going out on district and inspecting my lounge for nuisances    Not terribly bad I know, but certainly made my last weeks easy  

[stu999]

It was so traumatic I had to buy 5 more pairs to make up for it  

     

[cidersurfer]

I know somebody who curled one off on the bosses desk and stuck his ID card in it before leaving    

Class  

A lad in school left one in anothers lunchbox once, the joys of rugby!

[Arm]

Started a job on a Monday and resigned on Wednesday of the same week.

MD called me foolish and immature (was probably right)

Same MD called me 10 years later and offered me a job, he'd forgotten I'd already worked there. Reminded him I was still foolish and immature and he was a tw*t.

Was worth the wait.

[Nick M]

I spent the best part of 6 weeks going out on district and inspecting my lounge for nuisances    

Either Westy's really good at hide and seek or you have a *HOOOGE* lounge !!  

[stu999]

I know somebody who curled one off on the bosses desk and stuck his ID card in it before leaving    

I know a lad who filled a BigMac box with a prime example, walked up to the tills at Maccy's, threw the closed box on the counter and said to the manager

"This tastes like s**t!"

He had a point though...    

[Martin Keene]

I know somebody who curled one off on the bosses desk and stuck his ID card in it before leaving    

*makes note in diary for future reference*

Classic...

[Rob Navin]

Quick Update.

I decided to have a very easy last week but apart from that I will not be burning bridges.

However I can now beat Ash ( first time I have ever been able to say that )

The job that I should have been starting on Monday is now a thing of the past.

I was rung with an offer from another company offering lots more rebuild vouchers and as I had not signed any contracts I have hapilly taken that job.

To say I am pleased is an understatment.

[Mrs Westy]

Nice work    

Well done you must be dead chuffed.

I'm sure Paul@.. will be too  

[Rob Navin]

Paul is already planning his extension

[pistonbroke]

A lad in school left one in anothers lunchbox once, the joys of rugby!

Thought the 'Mars bar' tasted off

[Jan Coombes]

I can't beat the ID card.

One of the dentist at work sent a post card in saying, somthing like

Having a nice time, I quit.

[sedsy]

In a previous job where there were lots of total tossa managers above me (i was only a meesely maintenance mng) who never appreciated the hard work i put in.....

On my leaving day just prior to saying goodbye and doing the handshake thingy, i had a real good rummage down the crack of my A*** before i shook there hands !! come to think of it i made sure it was just before lunch to !! and i seem to remember there was no sh*t roll in the bog that morning where i had my routine ertha !!!!!!!!!

         

[markcoopers]

Have only been made redundant once, and took it quite badly. Did the usual and extracted quite a lot of silencing cash from the company, but to really make me feel better I Fu++ed up the company motor upon handing it back.

Met my now ex-boss at a train station, to give him the car and other company perks back. So I smeared a thin layer of 800+ scobie heat units chilli oil on the steering wheel, filled the tank with water, and propped a very precarious jar of garlic oil in the boot.

Apparently he got about 10 miles into a 60ish mile journey before grinding to halt, stinking of garlic and developing a rapidly quickening uncomfortable rash. Oh what a great day.