One for the oldies and to lighten up the day....

[mikef]

1.             To me: “Drink responsibly” means don’t spill it.

2.             Age 60 might be the new 40, but 9.00 pm is the new midnight.

3.             The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

4.             When I say: “The other day”, I could be referring to any time between yesterday and 15 years ago.

5.             I remember being able to get up without making sound effects.

6.             I had my patience tested.  I’m negative.

7.             If you lose a sock in the dryer, it comes back as a Tupperware lid that doesn’t fit any of your containers.

8.             If you are sitting in public and a stranger sits next to you, just stare straight ahead and say: “Did you bring the money?”

9.             I finally got 8 hours of sleep.  It took me 3 days, but whatever! 

10.          I hate it when a couple argue in public and I missed the beginning and don’t know whose side I’m on.

11.          When you do squats, are your knees meant to sound like a goat chewing on an aluminium can filled with celery?

12.          I don’t mean to interrupt people.  I just randomly remember things and get really excited.

13.          When I ask for directions, please don’t use words like “east”.

14.          Don’t bother walking a mile in my shoes since that would be boring. Just spend 30 seconds in my head.  That’ll freak you right out.

15.          Sometimes someone unexpected comes into your life out of nowhere, makes your heart race and changes you forever.  We call these people cops.

16.          My luck is like a bald guy who just won a comb.

17.          When one door closes and another opens, it probably means you are in prison.

18.          It’s the start of a brand new day and I’m off like a herd of turtles.

[Nic Chase (NICO) - Shropshire & Mid-Wales AO]

Take care Mike. Stay safe. 
nic

[mikef]

Thanks Nic.  You too.