.........mmmm, shaven pussy.

[The Dice Man]

........

[dasamdy]

and he looks decidedly unhappy about it!!

I've seen em shaved closer than that though

Dave

[westy]

Did'nt he star in Puss in Boots?

[The Dice Man]

.......and one for the leg men.

[The Dice Man]

.....Optical Illusion

It's like one of those Magic Eye things, took me ages to work out. Study the optical illusion below and after about 30 secs you'll start to see a boat in the background.

.....now, go to the bottom of the page

[The Dice Man]

.........wet nunney anyone?

[catflap]

LOL

[Heath Robinson]

......'QUEEN' and the old fav. Bohe...'CURRY RHAPSODY'

Naan, just killed a man  

Poppadom against his head  

had lime pickle now he's dead  

Naan, dinner's just begun  

but now I'm gonna crap it all away  

Naan, ohhhh ohhhhhh  

didn't mean to make you cry  

Seen nothing yet just see the loo tomorrow  

Curry on, curry on  

Cause nothing really Madras  

Too late, my dinner's gone  

Sends shivers down my spine  

Rectum aching all the time  

Goodbye Onion Bhaji, I've got to go  

Gotta leave you all behind and use the loo  

Naan, ohhhhh ohhhhh  

The Dopiaza is so mild  

I sometimes wish we'd never come here at all  

Sitar Solo  

I see a little Chicken Tikka on the side  

Rogan Josh, Rogan Josh, pass the chutney made of mango  

Vindaloo does nicely  

Very very spicy, Meat  

Byriani (Byriani)  

Byriani (Byriani)  

Byriani and aN aan  

(A Vindaloo loo loo loo)  

I've eaten Balti, somebody help me  

He's eaten Balti, get him to the lavatory  

Stand you well back  

Cause the loo is quarantined...  

Here it comes, there it goes  

Technicolor yawn  

I chunder  

NO!  

It's coming up again, (there he goes)  

I chunder it's coming back again, (there he goes)  

Coming back again (up again)  

Here it goes again, (no, no, no, no, no, no NO)  

On my knees I'm on my knees  

On his knees, oh, there he goes  

This Vindaloo  

It's about to wreck my guts  

Poor me.... poor me..... poor meeee....  

Sitar Solo  

So you think you can chunder and feel alright?  

So you try to eat curry and drink beer all night?  

Oh maybe, but now you puke like a baby  

just had to come out  

It just had to come right out in here !!!!!!!!!

[Chris Elworthy]

As performed by Freddie MORE-CURRY, ROGAN Taylor and BYRIANI May

[Heath Robinson]

.......puntastic, pun, pop-picker.

[Mark Stanton]

More chilli with the Deacon      

You forgot the bassman Mr E.    

And you're not allowed to use Rogan again          

[Man with no name]

......a man with no arms and no legs is out lying on the beach one day, enjoying his chance to get some sun. All of a sudden, a beautiful woman walks by and stops. "You poor man," she says. "I bet you've never been kissed have you?"

....the man has to admit, no, he never has, so she bends down and plants a good one right on the mouth.

.....a few minutes later, another gorgeous babe walks up. "You look like you need a hug," she says. He agrees that would be nice, she gives him a great one, and walks away.

.....a few minutes later, a drop-dead gorgeous girl walks by. She stops, a sultry smile on her face and looks down at him. "Mister", she says, "Have you ever been Fcuked?"

...."No", he says with a hopeful grin.

....."Well, you are now. The tide's coming in."

[FATBOY]

......meeting the weapons inspectors.