Buzz Billsberry Posted January 19, 2004 Posted January 19, 2004 ESSEX GIRLS What’s the difference between an Essex girl and an ironing board? You always struggle to get the legs open on an ironing board What’s the difference between an Essex girl and the Titanic? Only 1500 men went down on the Titanic What’s the difference between an Essex girl and a cream egg? You have to pay about 26p to lick out a cream egg What’s the difference between an Essex girl and a washing machine? If you dump your load in a washing machine it won’t follow you about for weeks What’s the difference between an Essex girl and an Essex bloke? The Pompey girl has a higher sperm count What does an Essex girl say to her partners after sex? “Do you all play for the same team?” What’s the difference between an Essex girl and the Bermuda triangle? The Essex girl has swallowed more seamen What’s the difference between an Essex girl and a Walrus? One has whiskers on it’s face and smells of fish the other lives in the sea Why does an Essex girl wear knickers? To keep her ankles warm What designer label do you find on an Essex girls knickers? “Next” What does an Essex girl use for protection when having sex? A bus shelter How do you know when an Essex girl has an orgasm? She drops her chips What’s the similarity between The Beatles and an Essex girl? Neither have been together since 1971 What’s the difference between an Essex girl and a supermarket trolley? A supermarket trolley has a mind of it’s own Quote
Chris Elworthy Posted January 19, 2004 Posted January 19, 2004 Whats the difference between an Essex Girl and a Fridge? Your meat doesn't smell when you take it out of a fridge Whats the difference betwen an Essex Girl and an Alsatian? Lipstick. Quote
Chris Elworthy Posted January 19, 2004 Posted January 19, 2004 What’s the similarity between The Beatles and an Essex girl? Neither have been together since 1971 Think you may have missed the 's legs bit off. ie - Whats the similarity between The Beatles and an Essex girl's legs ? Quote
Jan Coombes Posted January 19, 2004 Posted January 19, 2004 Where the hell do they live? It was on the news that the date rape drug was found on one in 25 glasses in a Chelmsford night club. So I guess it can't be that true. Unless it is the girls that are doing the drugging. Maybe I should go out clubing. Quote
Blatman Posted January 19, 2004 Posted January 19, 2004 Dukes in Chelmsford, but in true Essex fashion, start next door at The Rendevous (assuming they're still called that........) Gotta love them Essex girls....... Quote
Buzz Billsberry Posted January 20, 2004 Author Posted January 20, 2004 Where the hell do they live? It was on the news that the date rape drug was found on one in 25 glasses in a Chelmsford night club. So I guess it can't be that true. Unless it is the girls that are doing the drugging. Maybe I should go out clubing. In Essex Ya Swede Buzz Quote
Buzz Billsberry Posted January 20, 2004 Author Posted January 20, 2004 Dukes in Chelmsford, but in true Essex fashion, start next door at The Rendevous (assuming they're still called that........) Gotta love them Essex girls....... Blats you sound like u speak from experience How's ya meet smellin' Buzz Quote
Blatman Posted January 20, 2004 Posted January 20, 2004 I used to live in Chelmsford..... How's ya meet smellin' Dunno mate, it's a looooooong way from me nose....... Quote
Fat Albert Posted January 20, 2004 Posted January 20, 2004 What does an Essex girl put behind her ears? Her ankles Janet Have been to junior rugby away games at Romford and Thurrock with littlest (he's taller than me) sprog. Every word is true, I promise you, every word Quote
hilux Posted January 20, 2004 Posted January 20, 2004 What do you call a bunch of Essex girls floating in the Thames Isle of dogs Quote
7SE Posted January 20, 2004 Posted January 20, 2004 I used to work in Romford, only place that I have seen 3 female generations of the same family, all dressed the same (white mini skirt/stilletos) walking around with a fag in one hand mobile phone in the other, usually pushing a pram Quote
Cobby Posted January 20, 2004 Posted January 20, 2004 What does an Essex Girl and a Washing Machine have in common? They both drip when they are fu*ked. Quote
westy Posted January 20, 2004 Posted January 20, 2004 Dukes in Chelmsford, but in true Essex fashion, start next door at The Rendevous (assuming they're still called that........) Hate to disappoint you, but they haven't been called that for years! The Rendezvous is now called Main Street and Dukes has had a facelift and has been restyled as Dukes Genesis It's (allegedly) the place where they found traces of date rape drugs in 5% of all drinks when they did that survey recently and an important judge bloke urged parents "not to let your daughters go there" after some girl was (allegedly) date raped in the club itself. Now, where's my handbag and white stilettos... Quote
Mrs Westy Posted January 20, 2004 Posted January 20, 2004 Oh sorry that was me not Westy, damn automatic login I can confirm that Westy doesn't own any white stilettos or handbags Quote
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