Blatman Posted May 23, 2020 Share Posted May 23, 2020 A little girl was leaning into a lion's cage. Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the collar of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her, all under the eyes of her screaming parents. A biker jumps off his Harley, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch. Whimpering from the pain, the lion jumps back, letting go of the girl, and the biker brings the girl to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly. A BBC reporter, Laura Kuenssberg, has watched the whole event. Laura, addressing the Harley rider says, "Sir, this was the most gallant and bravest thing I've seen a man do in my whole life.” The Harley rider replies, "Why, it was nothing, really. The lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted as I felt right.” Miss Kuenssberg "Well, I'll make sure this won't go unnoticed. I'm a BBC journalist, you know, and tomorrow's news will run this story. So, what do you do for a living, and what political affiliation do you have?” The biker replies "I'm a British Army veteran, a Conservative and I voted for Brexit”. Laura Keunssberg leaves the scene. The following morning the biker turns on BBC News to see if it indeed brings news of his actions. BBC Headline: RIGHT WING UK VETERAN ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT & STEALS HIS LUNCH. And THAT pretty much sums up journalism approach to the news these days 1 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Man On The Clapham Omnibus Posted May 23, 2020 Share Posted May 23, 2020 Excellent! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DonPeffers Posted May 23, 2020 Share Posted May 23, 2020 Recent report from Ms K, BBC balanced journalism dept. (blah blah) makes me wonder if I do want to renew my TV licence. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rory's Dad Posted May 23, 2020 Share Posted May 23, 2020 I can't watch the BBC's 1:00 news. The journalists are not worthy of the term and the news reader acts all shocked and surprised at every Covid 19 'story'. Stupid, so-called 'political' angles... BBC Radio 4 is much better. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nick Algar - Competition Secretary Posted May 23, 2020 Share Posted May 23, 2020 4 hours ago, Blatman said: A little girl was leaning into a lion's cage. Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the collar of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her, all under the eyes of her screaming parents. A biker jumps off his Harley, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch. Whimpering from the pain, the lion jumps back, letting go of the girl, and the biker brings the girl to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly. A BBC reporter, Laura Kuenssberg, has watched the whole event. Laura, addressing the Harley rider says, "Sir, this was the most gallant and bravest thing I've seen a man do in my whole life.” The Harley rider replies, "Why, it was nothing, really. The lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted as I felt right.” Miss Kuenssberg "Well, I'll make sure this won't go unnoticed. I'm a BBC journalist, you know, and tomorrow's news will run this story. So, what do you do for a living, and what political affiliation do you have?” The biker replies "I'm a British Army veteran, a Conservative and I voted for Brexit”. Laura Keunssberg leaves the scene. The following morning the biker turns on BBC News to see if it indeed brings news of his actions. BBC Headline: RIGHT WING UK VETERAN ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT & STEALS HIS LUNCH. And THAT pretty much sums up journalism approach to the news these days Blaters, that one is excellent mate 👍 PMSL here. Oh so true. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pistonbroke Posted May 23, 2020 Share Posted May 23, 2020 Reminded me of the old Stanley Holloway Monologue "The Lion & Albert " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Man On The Clapham Omnibus Posted May 23, 2020 Share Posted May 23, 2020 Great minds, Bernie! "Tha' lion's eaten our Albert!" Hear for yourself! Not to forget Sam and his infamous musket here! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pistonbroke Posted May 23, 2020 Share Posted May 23, 2020 Nohas Ark one of the best lines It rained and it rained for a fortnight till folks up to rooftops at climb they said it were wettest summer that Bury had had for some time ! ☂️☂️☂️ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lyonspride Posted May 25, 2020 Share Posted May 25, 2020 Let's have another one, it involves Dominic Cummings, a sick wife, a child with Autism, a house near to his parents (although saying "grandparents" makes it sound better) a man with a shop at Barnard Castle who looks identical to Cummings and a nation of idiots with pitch forks and torches. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arm Posted May 25, 2020 Share Posted May 25, 2020 Looking forward to his briefing this aft Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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