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The Mental Health Thread


AdamR

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2 hours ago, GaryD1971 said:

#secretsociety! I really like that! 

Thanks @Jude - The Mad Widow. We have guided the Mother in law towards various groups recently, but the one that's been the most help is the small group of friends she has reconnected with who take part in regular quiz nights on the local scene. With their winnings they book a meal out in a nice restaurant together. There's only 4 or 5 of them, but that's enough for company and chat. 

I really admire how pro-active you have been in helping other people through your FB group. That takes a lot of strength and courage to put yourself out there following such a horrific loss. You are much stronger than you realise. 

Now that the weather should hopefully be on the mend, my therapy sessions will be back in the garage with a certain yellow little number that is craving some attention. I have neglected the build for some time and have only recently started back at it again, hence my return to the Tech info pages recently. :yellow-westy: ???:zzz:

I have no idea how to unhide my hidden comment!!!!  Well at least I understand what you are saying here... I think, as I said we need a Westfield/Black Dog badge! #secretsociety!  Keep smiling, fake it til you make it!

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I didn't actually put the last 2 emoticons on that post @Jude - The Mad Widow. My Kindle had a meltdown and I had to resort to using my phone to see whether it had actually uploaded! Then I thought I had deleted your post. I'm glad that's all that got added to the end of that post.... :getmecoat:

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17 minutes ago, GaryD1971 said:

I didn't actually put the last 2 emoticons on that post @Jude - The Mad Widow. My Kindle had a meltdown... 

 

You're lucky it's just your Kindle!!!! Lol

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4 hours ago, Jude - The Mad Widow said:

have no idea how to unhide my hidden comment!!!! 


have in-hidden it. I think up you do an injustice to your self calling it self indulgent, too, I know it’s perhaps a cliche to some, but I think it just helps prove the universality of the truth that setting out to help others often helps yourself, just as much.

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  • 2 weeks later...

So how is everyone doing?  Are you in isolation? Sick? Denial?

 

A week ago I put myself in social isolation for 2 reasons, one, because I get a mild asthma and two, because I can.

The result is I am now fighting depression daily, or hourly to be honest. I cant see my three week old grandson because his daddy is ill, he has a work colleague with the virus so...  I will be happier when they close the schools and we can see who's got what...

 

Its taken me two years to get my life back, my first singing gig (in 6 years) was next week, now cancelled, 2 parties, now cancelled, new grandson, cant visit. Best friends in isolation having returned from Italy, classical evening at the Albert Hall, will be cancelled, classic car shows a plenty will all be cancelled. A month in Europe in my motor home...   Just a few of the things I had been looking forward to. Now i'm a miserable weepy git struggling to find a reason to get up in the morning. 

I know for a fact I am actually fortunate, I have a nice garden and family who skype me and neighbours I can shout to from my drive, Im not losing my income etc. I think I need a kick up the RRRS - please form an orderly Q !!! 

 

Being bipolar means I might see things differently tomorrow, next week... 

 

Tomorrow is supposed to be dry - I will get the Wez out for a blat - 

 

Another bit of self indulgent twaddle but here it is....

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12 minutes ago, Jude - The Mad Widow said:

So how is everyone doing?  Are you in isolation? Sick? Denial?

 

A week ago I put myself in social isolation for 2 reasons, one, because I get a mild asthma and two, because I can.

The result is I am now fighting depression daily, or hourly to be honest. I cant see my three week old grandson because his daddy is ill, he has a work colleague with the virus so...  I will be happier when they close the schools and we can see who's got what...

 

Its taken me two years to get my life back, my first singing gig (in 6 years) was next week, now cancelled, 2 parties, now cancelled, new grandson, cant visit. Best friends in isolation having returned from Italy, classical evening at the Albert Hall, will be cancelled, classic car shows a plenty will all be cancelled. A month in Europe in my motor home...   Just a few of the things I had been looking forward to. Now i'm a miserable weepy git struggling to find a reason to get up in the morning. 

I know for a fact I am actually fortunate, I have a nice garden and family who skype me and neighbours I can shout to from my drive, Im not losing my income etc. I think I need a kick up the RRRS - please form an orderly Q !!! 

 

Being bipolar means I might see things differently tomorrow, next week... 

 

Tomorrow is supposed to be dry - I will get the Wez out for a blat - 

 

Another bit of self indulgent twaddle but here it is....

Chin up Jude. Take the car out, that will help. Bit of wind in your hair. 

More importantly focus on seeing your grandson again, that will make the wait worth while. 
I’ve just got one and he is a joy. Now five months old. 
 

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2 hours ago, Jude - The Mad Widow said:

Tomorrow is supposed to be dry - I will get the Wez out for a blat - 

Don't forget some pics for us Jude :cool::yes:

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Sorry to hear of your troubles Jude. I guess this 'episode' hits home how important social contact to you is! I would say kindness rather than a kick up the backside is the right thing at the moment 😊 I hope you can continue to see the positives and that you can still use Skype, the phone, your car, perhaps even the motorhome for a night away somewhere, and that today feels different. The birds are singing and the sun is out here - hope the same for you 🙏

 

It's business as normal for me but my ponderings around this whole virus thing have indirectly caused me a lot of brain ache and fairly gloomy weekend. I very much look at things from a scientific point of view and posed a question to a group of long-term school friends: Why is the world seemingly so fascinated with keeping people alive? (The potential reasons I put forward were 'unconventional' to say the least - as I said I look at things from a scientific perspective)

 

I can bore everyone with the details if you want (ha), but in short I was met with resistance to and attack of my thoughts, yet nobody else put forward a possible answer. This isn't the first time I have had this from the same group of people. It led me to question my longest-standing friendships and this combined with another few days of ponderings about changing the whole tack of my life led me to feel extremely unsettled. Even a very muddy mountain bike ride in blustery showers (usually just the tonic!) wasn't able to pull me round.

 

Today is better but the feeling of 'being different', and the uneasy sensation this gives when your self-confidence isn't high enough to push it aside, remains bubbling away underneath.

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@AdamR 

What an interesting response and why do we want to keep people alive??!! . Gosh that's a conversation to be had.              Personally I don't fancy being ill. Who does. Even as a chronic depressive there have been very few times I wanted to die. Today its blue skies and daffodils. My yellow wez is on the drive waiting for a quick wash. 

Mental health forums I read have others struggling like me which actually makes me feel better. How bad is that!  It's the constant struggle /challenge to constantly get back from the severe mood drops that take their toll. Its finding myself down in the bottom of this black barrel knowing I have to get out yet again that have caused suicidal thoughts.

Anyway, I like life and its precious because we are loved and wanted.. Its pretty short and I've no wish to cop out prematurely.  

Goodness depressing during isolation is on the radio!! 

I have a car to wash.. Photos to follow xx

 

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13 minutes ago, AdamR said:

Why is the world seemingly so fascinated with keeping people alive?

 

I'm kind of surprised that your friends didn't have an answer.

 

The world tries to keep people alive, because otherwise what's the point? Everything that any of us care about is predicated on being alive. Every positive thing, every experience, every friendship, everything that we enjoy or look forward to, all relies on us being alive. All the bad things too admittedly, but best to skip over that. This thread is a great example of people who are finding things difficult, but are still finding enjoyment, and still carrying on. This thread, and this club as a whole, is also an excellent example of brilliant people, living meaningful lives. Giving up their time to help and support others. Why wouldn't we try to keep them all alive? 

 

There's nothing wrong with looking at the whole thing from a purely logical point of view either. You can bet that there are some frank discussions taking place right now in the Gov and the NHS, and some hard decisions being made. I'm sure that some of your unconventional reasons were mentioned. It needs to happen.


Yeah, the next few months are going to be rough. That just means that we might need to search harder for the positives, and to make sure that we look after each other.

 

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But the world, (first world, at least), has developed an overriding drive to "keep people alive", at virtually any cost,  even when it goes directly against the natural order of things. It's part of this push to prolong life and cling on, I'm sure, that's increasing the occurrence of the various dementias etc

 

We frequently as a society "keep people alive" for our own selfish needs, whether it's in the best interests of the person or not. (And as at some stage in the future, I swallow that last pill, or whatever method it happens to be, you can bet your life that the huge guilt from having been utterly selfish in that respect has at long last got on top of me.)

 

 

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1 hour ago, AdamR said:

Why is the world seemingly so fascinated with keeping people alive?

This is a very interesting question. 
 

My wife and I touched on it this weekend when I mentioned that one possible response to this virus was to develop “herd immunity”. This would probably entail infecting some 80% of the population.
 

On one hand, as this virus isn’t as lethal as say Ebola, it might solve the problem without the country grinding to a recessionary halt (assuming the virus doesn’t mutate along the way!). But on the other it effectively condemns the most vulnerable in society to a death sentence. 
 

Glad I’m not making the call.

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41 minutes ago, Dave Eastwood (Gadgetman) - Club Secretary said:

even when it goes directly against the natural order of things


Well, to paraphrase Terry Pratchett somewhat, the Natural Order of things is to live in a tree and choke down your food raw. Natural doesn't necessarily mean good.

 

You're almost certainly right that the increase in lifespan has increased some diseases, especially dementia and cancers. But that just gives us a separate problem that I'm sure we'll solve with time and effort. We usually do.

 

I do understand about the fear of whether it's in a person's best interest. I lost my Dad a couple of months back, and have been struggling somewhat since. At the end, we could have fought to keep him alive for another few days; we didn't as it wasn't fair on him. His fight to stay alive for the last few years however was absolutely worth it, and I'll always be grateful for the extra time we had with him that we wouldn't have done if he had stopped treatment earlier. 

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I'm afraid I did fight back, to the extent of physically assisting the doctors, and condemned my own mother to an additional six/seven months of tortuous living hell.

 

If I could take back that judgement call, I absolutely would.

 

Obviously, every circumstance is different, I completely agree, and wouldn't want to take that away. But in our forwards and damn the torpedoes attitudes, sometimes "we" do make things worse. It's something that we do need to understand and realise.

 

I guess what I'm trying to say, is that we need to be able to talk about and understand the deeply unpalatable side of life at a personal level, if we're to ever make the hard choices at a national and international level.

 

 

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